You wouldn’t believe it, the singer remarks. There she was preparing for her first album release in nearly a decade, deeply enamored with her current love, and finally the parent to a young child after facing fertility challenges for ten years, feeling invincible. Suddenly in spring she was told she had a breast cancer diagnosis.
The singer-songwriter, actual name J. Cornish, is famous for being brutally honest. The album, her latest release, was intended as an transparent story, dealing with every bit of hardship she’d faced since she last worked on songs (endometriosis, miscarriage, broken romances, emotional abuse, suicidal thoughts) with characteristic openness. The first single, No Secrets, was dropped in April. But by then there was a mighty secret. Her diagnosis. Later follow-up track, Living My Best Life, debuted in late spring and Cornish was talking to press about how she was enjoying life to the fullest, while still secretly living with the disease. A month later she shared the news, and in the start of summer she received surgical treatment.
She gives me her best “Are you kidding?” look. “I come out with a song called No Secrets. I’m conducting every media appearance, and they inquire, ‘So what’s new with you?’ and I respond, ‘Uh, nothing really’” Cornish has just had to cancel tour dates because she’s awaiting cosmetic procedures.
We meet at a studio in the capital. She is wearing a beige fake-leather jacket, denim trousers with detailed white appliqués, off-white boots and large glasses. Think motorcycle style meets vintage look. “I feel like I’m in the seventies and I should have a partner with a mustache.” Easy Rider, I say, recalling the picture. “That’s what people called me at school!” She smiles. Cornish is fast-thinking, bold and filter-free. She says she has always fancied doing comedy and is hoping to make her standup debut next year. “I enjoy humor. During performances I often tease the audience.”
Health Struggles and Diagnosis
Cornish was getting ready for an appearance at the awards show when she found a lump. “I quickly sought to get it looked at, had an ultrasound, and they told me, ‘It appears fine; your tissue is healthy.’ And I was, like, ‘Yet I sense it. My arm hurts and numbness in my fingers whenever I rise.’ And they replied, ‘We should biopsy it?’ That was 28 March, the following my birthday.” It was a weekend eve. The doctor told her if it was concerning she’d contact on the start of the week. By then the singer had persuaded herself it was nothing. The way she describes it, it was inopportune to face illness when she had a busy schedule.
“Just two weeks before from debuting the project after years away and an extended break. And the doctor messaged and said, ‘Are you free at six?’ And I was, like, ‘It’s virtual, probably routine.’ So I jump on the Zoom thinking it’s all going to be positive, and she goes, ‘Please take a seat.’ The solemn tone? And she reveals, ‘I regret to inform you but your reports have indicated malignant cells.’” What did you say? “I replied, ‘Well, that’s not great. The timing is terrible.’ The first thing I thought was, ‘I have to survive for my boy.’”
I’ve been labeled difficult for knowing myself
She considered the operation terrifying and absurd. “I fear going under. You’re escorted. During crises you are wheeled, but then I just marched with a gown on and my rear exposed. You feel like you’re in an episode of Black Mirror.” But, Cornish says, she’s been blessed. No chemotherapy or radiation, just the procedure. “Cancer is awful, but you know what? Thank fuck I found it early. I had the mastectomy recently and my affected breast now appears as a grapefruit under a tight bedsheet.” Another grin. “I got to keep the nipple, though.”
The follow-up procedure is therapeutic and aesthetic. Her breasts, she notes, are now “asymmetrical. They didn’t do an implant as small as my original. That’s impolite! I reflected, why make it worse, I’m already having a hard period. So rude! It’s funny because I said I’d not undergo augmentation because I’ve got OCD, and I know they’d never be flawless. Cancer ruined that plan.”
A History of Health Challenges
The singer is accustomed to medical issues. She believes her perspective on the cancer has been so upbeat because she’s familiar with medical emergencies. They have often coincided with peak moments, acting as a reminder, or blow, to make her recall not to assume everything is fine. “Frankly, I feel the universe whispers, ‘Enjoying yourself? Take a seat.’ From a young age, it has consistently accompanied moments of success for me; something severe or obscure has happened to my health.”
She reminisces to her childhood, already beginning starring in the stage in Whistle Down the Wind (she was chosen at the age of nine years old). That’s when she was found to have the medical problem WPW, which can cause a rapid pulse as well as dizziness and palpitations. “I was going in and out of rehearsals on an drip, and being readmitted at night.” She fast-forwards half a dozen years, and young Jessica has become part of the female band the group while studying at the academy. “I signed my initial contract, and I had a cerebral event. Then when I was about to put out music in recently I had a car crash and my larynx moved up and I couldn’t sing for a long period.”
Wow, I say, hold on, I am overwhelmed. At just 17? She nods|agrees
